The best feeling in the world is not love.
Sure, that’s one of the best feelings, but nothing feels as good as the first sense of your own repair/growth. Think of the first time you can think about a person who hurt you and you feel nothing. That person’s name becomes a mere name, instead of a symbol of all your regret, loss, and anger.
There have been times when an indelible voice became a distant and fuzzy recollection. If I were in a crowd and he called my name, I wouldn’t be stopped in my tracks. I’d probably assume he was calling another name, another Amanda.
For Amanda is no longer me, either. It’s a collection of letters my parents decided I’d go by, but six letters have never been enough to hold all this life that sits here in a red sweater pounding key after key.
The heart and mind scab over and the faintest scars are left. I’m stronger. I’ve outgrown just a name and so has he. We have grown and grown…apart.
Ahhhh young one.. When you can look back and not feel, that is not rebirth or growth.. that is sad! Feelings are what make us who we are, so if you don’t still feel something for someone you loved, even after 100 years, then you never truly loved!