Provided you get out of your apartment, New York City never feels lonely. Wherever your destination, people will be there when you arrive and hot on your heels as you leave. The only time I’m ever on the subway alone, which happens about twice a week, is when I’m taking the C back to my apartment from where I tutor in Washington Heights. Service on that subway line terminates where I begin my journey home, so unless it’s been a particularly busy day for hospital visitors and employees (the stop is where all of Columbia’s medical facilities lie), there are few riders.
The first time I had a subway car all to myself, I called out in the silence. “Hey!” No one was there to ignore me, sneaking glances quickly averted if eyes met. The next times, I sang. This only lasted two stops before other commuters joined the car. Strangely enough, I felt relieved by the company. I’m accustomed to being alone with strangers most of my waking hours. My voice never even grew to its potential, unencumbered by self-consciousness in those few minutes alone, because I knew I really wasn’t. Not here with these millions of people aboveground, and the handful in subway cars on either side of mine.
When people get on my subway car after the brief solo ride, they often sit near me. Not beside me, but on the same stretch of seating or across from me. This comes as no surprise. Those people at the movie theater who sit right in front or behind you, despite an abundance of unoccupied seats, aren’t just trying to annoy you or get the second best seat.
There’s something about being alone together with strangers who really aren’t so different, who are doing the same thing you’re doing. There’s a comfort and camaraderie in not getting to be completely comfortable and doing whatever it is you do when completely, ostensibly alone in this crowded city where people live above, below, and alongside you. In my case, that would be singing, but maybe not for long. I gave up on keeping my humming, writing, grooming, and napping private a long time ago.
Was it hard to learn the different subway stops? I’ve glanced at the MTA subway map and it gives me a headache. I’ve been on the subway before (group trip to NYC), so I didn’t have to worry about knowing my way around.
C-Nora