My body’s going through some tough stuff this week. You may have read about it in a Judy Blume book or five back in the day.
My estrogen-heavy internal organs are getting divorced. Or maybe they’re feuding friends who miss bonding over training bras and secret crushes.
All I know is I’m so cranky, I could cut a bitch. And so ravenous, I would probably then eat said bitch. With that leftover Manchego cheese in my refrigerator.
Wednesday was Mike’s turn to MAMM up.
Lunch was a lot of orange. A. Lot. Of. Orange.
Chicken fried rice with carrots, peas, and corn. Raw carrots and hard boiled eggs. Oranges for dessert.
The spread looked like one of those pictures in US Weekly when the cover story is “[Celebrity You Assumed Was Dead] Thinner Than Ever: How She Did It!”
This is how they do it: They eat stuff that’s all well and good, good for you even.
And then they’re still hungry.
I mean, I’m hungry whatever I do this week - this has been going on for days.
But then I was hungry on top of hungry.
It’s so bad that tonight I went to the grocery store and bought a hard candy called Nips. I tore into the box as I walked to the subway and nearly broke my teeth on the damn things.
Normally, I’d avoid a product called Nips, whatever it is. The chicken fried rice in Oliver Twist portions made me do it.
Orange you glad it’s my turn to bring lunch today?
We’re eating a wheelbarrow of guacamole and a family-sized bag of tortilla chips.
Then bring on the churros!
Related Posts
- Project MAMM: Day 1: Pasta and hummus with a side of food coma
- Project MAMM: Day 2: Your third-grade lunch, except with Manchego cheese
- Nacho Cheese, if you’re nasty
- Project MAMM: Day 5: Tabouleh by yours truly
- Project MAMM: Day 6: Quick and picky tacos
- Project MAMM: Day 4: Tuna for two
- A peanut butter and jelly sandwich would never do this
