Me: Have you noticed that you never hear anyone say, “I have gas out the wazoo”?
Him: Yeah. But that would make a lot of sense.
Posts under ‘Conserved Conversations’
Cause and effect
The worst thing a parent has ever (allegedly) said during a parent-teacher conference:
Explaining black comedy to my black students
Me: Yeah, like a black comedy.
Cade and the crackers
“Today when I was in Garden of Eden, I was looking for those crackers you like. I couldn’t find them and I was in a hurry, so I was just gonna ask one of the workers where they are.
Why I could never teach kindergarten
Karen, my co-teacher: Teaching middle school is challenging. [Turning to the kindergarten teachers we're sitting with]. Your kids are challenging in a different way.
Crossed wires
Another great day of professional development, while talking about neuromotor functions.
Elizabeth (a math teacher colleague of mine): Yeah, I had a shihzu, but it ate its own feces so I got rid of it.
Teeth are overrated
I’m walking downstairs beside a teacher and a little girl from the school on the second floor of my building. (Three different schools are hosted in my school’s building). I overhear this chirpy, silly conversation, make eye contact with the teacher, smile, and shrug.
Like one of those wind-up dolls
A phone conversation with my sister, the astute observer.
Megan: So I think Daddy broke his finger.
I’m a survivor
Vernon is taking his practice state math test beside me. I’ve been sitting by him for an hour, reading each question and answer choice. While he works on a problem, I lean back in my chair and crack my knuckles.
Them other boys don’t know how to act
Student: [singing and dancing in his best Justin Timberlake imitation] “Go ahead, be gone with it. VIP. Go ahead, be gone with it. Drinks on me…”
