Posts under ‘Conserved Conversations’

Coining the phrase now

Me: Have you noticed that you never hear anyone say, “I have gas out the wazoo”?

Him: Yeah. But that would make a lot of sense.

Coining the phrase now

Cause and effect

The worst thing a parent has ever (allegedly) said during a parent-teacher conference:

Cause and effect

Explaining black comedy to my black students


Me: Yeah, like a black comedy.

Explaining black comedy to my black students

Cade and the crackers

“Today when I was in Garden of Eden, I was looking for those crackers you like. I couldn’t find them and I was in a hurry, so I was just gonna ask one of the workers where they are.

Cade and the crackers

Why I could never teach kindergarten

Karen, my co-teacher: Teaching middle school is challenging. [Turning to the kindergarten teachers we're sitting with]. Your kids are challenging in a different way.

Why I could never teach kindergarten

Crossed wires

Another great day of professional development, while talking about neuromotor functions.

Elizabeth (a math teacher colleague of mine): Yeah, I had a shihzu, but it ate its own feces so I got rid of it.

Crossed wires

Teeth are overrated

I’m walking downstairs beside a teacher and a little girl from the school on the second floor of my building. (Three different schools are hosted in my school’s building). I overhear this chirpy, silly conversation, make eye contact with the teacher, smile, and shrug.

Teeth are overrated

Like one of those wind-up dolls

A phone conversation with my sister, the astute observer.

Megan: So I think Daddy broke his finger.

Like one of those wind-up dolls

I’m a survivor

Vernon is taking his practice state math test beside me. I’ve been sitting by him for an hour, reading each question and answer choice. While he works on a problem, I lean back in my chair and crack my knuckles.

I’m a survivor

Them other boys don’t know how to act

Student: [singing and dancing in his best Justin Timberlake imitation]  “Go ahead, be gone with it. VIP. Go ahead, be gone with it. Drinks on me…”

Them other boys don’t know how to act