Tuesday, November 14, 2006
by Amanda.
*I wrote this last night in longhand and intended to type it for the blog, but my dad called and talked about how he predicts that when I’m 25 (what is apparently a ripe old age and the cut-off date for knowing what I want to do with the rest of my life), I’ll look back on this day - on the last one year plus of days - and realize it was all a waste of time. I resent that very much, and needless to say, it didn’t put me in the mood to do anything but fume and cry and feel a distance from him that surpasses miles.
Thursday, November 9, 2006
by Amanda.
I tossed and turned last night, dreading this day that has trickled between my fingers. It’s nice when you don’t know whether something you did was right or wrong, good or bad, but your time to act is gone. Nothing’s changing the choices you made, so you may as well exhale.
Tuesday, November 7, 2006
by Amanda.
O, how mine weary eyes doth water by 10 p.m. this night!
I had to return to work after my boss sent my co-teacher and I harsh emails about how all the systems in place in our classroom (as mandated by the obsessively micro-managed administration, mind you) must now be overthrown and replaced. Work has been trying in recent weeks, as there’s always someone breathing down my neck, telling me I’m not doing things the way the school dictates they be done. Everything is very rigid and structured and the whole school really ought to undo a button, because I’m not the only person in this environment feeling stifled.
Friday, November 3, 2006
by Amanda.
At school, teachers send anecdotals via email throughout the day. It keeps everyone informed of student behavior and reminds me that working with middle schoolers isn’t so different from working with say, farm animals or people in a psych ward.
Friday, November 3, 2006
by Amanda.
Wednesday was a terrible day at work. Not I.S. 666 terrible, but functioning school terrible. The schedule was wonky, due to half the middle school being out on a field trip. I also didn’t have my co-teacher, Karen, there so I didn’t have the extra help to put the kibosh on misbehavior. Today, Karen stepped out again for a meeting, and some of the kids were ready to play.
Thursday, November 2, 2006
by Amanda.
Another great day of professional development, while talking about neuromotor functions.
Elizabeth (a math teacher colleague of mine): Yeah, I had a shihzu, but it ate its own feces so I got rid of it.
Wednesday, November 1, 2006
by Amanda.
I’m walking downstairs beside a teacher and a little girl from the school on the second floor of my building. (Three different schools are hosted in my school’s building). I overhear this chirpy, silly conversation, make eye contact with the teacher, smile, and shrug.
Friday, October 27, 2006
by Amanda.
I’ve been meaning to blog for a few days now, but this was the week that got away. The two times I sat down with the intention of writing this very sentence, Blogger wasn’t working for me. I’ve found that the pressure at work fluctuates week to week. It tends to be on one week, off the next.
Thursday, October 19, 2006
by Amanda.
Now I don’t want this to be construed as pessimism or naysaying, but I recently got a note from a new reader that has made me do a lot of thinking. Mark is a special ed teacher who wants to move to New York City from Texas to be a public school principal. Mark wants to make a difference. I don’t want to be too quick to judge, but I think maybe Mark doesn’t know what he could be getting himself into.
Thursday, October 19, 2006
by Amanda.
Vernon is taking his practice state math test beside me. I’ve been sitting by him for an hour, reading each question and answer choice. While he works on a problem, I lean back in my chair and crack my knuckles.
